Philosophy Haikus
Ok, so I like haikus. 
Here are some haikus about Kant:
Kant claims that space is                       The things that appear
transcendentally ideal                          are spatiotemporal
empirically real                                'tis no illusion
representations                                 The I-Think can be                
modifications in us                             with each representation
that's how they appear?!                        or else it ain't mine
twelve categories
derived from forms of judgment?
or forced to fit them?
Inner sense misled,                              The B-deduction       
ignored apperception.                            seems less idealistic than
Hume's fatal error?                              the previous one
Garve reviewed first book
to which Kant harshly replied:
Henry Allison:                                   The things in themselves
transcendental idealism                          considered differently
is epistemic                                     are things that appear
The crucial notion:       
Epistemic conditions 
is somewhat obscure 
James van Cleve believes                         appearances are
Kant's really like Berkeley                      in our representations
a true idealist                                  virtual objects
Rae Langton maintains                            The appearances
transcendental idealism                          are extrinsic properties
is Humility                                      the forces of things 
Why be so Humble?                         
Ignorance of the Inner
She blames causation
Jonathan Bennett:                                Things we cannot see
Kant's a phenomenalist                           still belong to possible
It's all in the head!                            experiences
Other historical haikus:
Leibniz asserted                                 Hume looked for himself
that monads have no windows                      but could find no impression 
each mirrors the rest                            No idea of "I"
Descartes divided                                Berkeley has said                              
the body infinitely                              that the material world is
the mind not at all                              composed of God's thoughts
all this you can doubt                           sensory features
your body, the world are lost                    identified with ideas
meditate again                                   Berkeley's error
Locke's ideas are veils                          Don't like skepticism?                             
that obscure our perception                      then put the world in your mind
of things outside us                             then you can see it!
Heidegger forgets                                
that the meaning of being                       
is not what it seems                             
Ryle said: Descartes's view                      Ryle: to have a mind
is a category mistake                            is to have behavior that
"mind" picks out no thing                        we call purposeful
Arithmetic fell                                  Russell and Whitehead   
when Russell showed to Frege                     had a remarkable view  
a contradiction                                  that maths is logic
Jeremy Bentham                                   Francis H. Bradley
said pleasure is the sole good                   had trouble with relations
forget quality                                   and so lived alone
The mind is the brain                            The worlds of Lewis   
this some philosophers have claimed              though merely possible
Place, Smart, then Armstrong                     contain flesh and blood    
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Back to the Monads.
Funny picture of me with an even funnier guy.